Sunday, August 11, 2013

Listicles: 10 Ridiculous Foods

This week's Listicles left me stumped again. I've done posts on ridiculous baby products, don't feel like rehashing that again. Hmmm... So I looked inward... searched deep inside... to my stomach, which was rumbling. YES! I'll write about food! So, my take on this week's Listicles is:

10 RIDICULOUS THINGS FOODS I SAW ONLINE

Before I launch into my list, let me say I am not a dietician, nor do I have perfect eating habits. I eat & love some things that are kind of cringe-worthy. At the moment I blame pregnancy. ;)

Here's my list:
 
  1. Pancakes & Sausage On A Stick | NEW! With Chocolate Chips! Aaaaaugh! These weird combo convenience foods have to stop! Just. Stop. People.
  2. Candy or foodstuffs designed to look like poop, whether on purpose or not. Ugh. Barf. 
  3. Hot Beef Sundae. Now, I've eaten bacon brownies & those were actually good. Somehow bacon is mostly immune from being disgusting when paired with things like apple fritters or brownies. But Hot Beef Sundae??? Guh. Whose idea was this? In a food cart, no less? For the image, check out the Rad Dish's blog.
  4. Pink Slime. If you don't know what I'm talking about, go watch this short video. This stuff is ridiculous in such a disgusting way. The most ridiculous thing? Most likely, just like me, YOU have all eaten it, unknowingly. *shudder*
  5. Creepy mega-calorie fast food sandwiches, like this doughnut burger, or the KFC Double Down. Any sandwich that has its own Wikipedia page is probably suspicious, no?
  6. Food glop in tubes. For astronauts, okay, but for those of us living within the reaches of Earth's gravity fields, who don't need to worry about the efficiency of avoiding cutlery, can we stop making squeezable goop designed to be eaten directly out of a tube & calling it food?
  7. Corndog pizza? WTF? Noooooo!
  8. Luncheon meat with a face. Luncheon meat is bad enough (seriously folks, the quality of the meat & the additives are so NOT good for you) but extruding a log of it with a face built in so that you get a creepy clown staring up at you from your sandwich. Eek!
  9. McCroquette. I came across this (& ate one) in Amsterdam several years ago at McDonald's. It was their one nod-to-the-local-cuisine food. Here's what it is: a potato patty, breaded & fried, squished between a couple limp white bun halves. There was probably sauce, but the breaded carb on a bun thing kind of overwhelms my memory. What were they thinking?!?! (& yes, it was as bland & blah as it sounds)
  10. Wonder+ Invisibles Bread (or pretty much any other kind of enriched white bread). As far as I can tell, this seems to be the process of making this stuff: Let's strip out all the nutritional value of the whole grains by processing it into bright white flour. Then let's do some weird stuff to put some of those vitamins, etc back into the product, while keeping it lily-white. Is brown bread so bad? Is texture so bad? Why does it have to be white & fluffy? I just don't get it!
All righty, it's your turn: what's the most ridiculous food you've seen, online or off? Did you eat it? Do you have any guilty secret pleasure kind of ridiculous foods you'd like to confess? Leave a comment below, I dare ya!


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7 comments:

  1. OMG!! Yu really found the worst of the worst. Yuck!!!!!!

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  2. I have never seen the creepy face clown lunchmeat - that is the stuff of nightmares. I was shopping the other day and some lady ordered olive loaf. There is nothing in that description that makes me want to eat that. Yuck.

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    Replies
    1. I've seen it around online a few times & I think once in real life. I can sort of understand the extruded cookies that have faces, but extending the technology to luncheon meat? Gah...

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  3. This is an awesome list! Totally ridiculous! I checked out that luncheon meat - that is crazy! #1 and 3 - total mess.

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    Replies
    1. Thanks! I was totally horrified to see Beef & Sundae together in one food. Gah. HAD to include it.

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  4. McKroket btw, and WRONG WRONG WRONG! That is not potato! It is 'beef'. And European. We know how not to use pink slime :p A Kroket is beef, and a mckroket is just that in a patty, with a nice sauce on it (well... I didnt think its too bad) and tadaaa. Done. Come on... Calling that disgusting is kinda sick.

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